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★★
Directed by: Taylor Chien
Written by: Taylor Chien
Starring: Bianca Haase, Brock O’Hurn, Michelle Randolph, Michael Vlamis
Film Review by: Chris Olson
The Resort Movie Review
Sexy white post-teens get a Hawaiian punch when they go looking for trouble at an abandoned holiday resort.
Director Taylor Chien is back in the seat for the first time in 10 years, following 2011’s Cornered, this time with a story he has written about a haunted resort in Hawaii. The plot follows Lex (Bianca Haase) and her three friends who travel to the island, hoping to find out more about the legendary Half-Faced Girl who apparently haunts the now-abandoned building.
Curiosity killed the cat and is likely to get these dare devilling friends when weird stuff, obviously, starts to happen and not even their beach bods can help them.
Plenty of self-awareness flows through The Resort, with nods of the heads to the horror genre, and even the spoof - with a mention of Scary Movie in one scene. The characters also represent an Instagram generation, of which they mock and imbibe in equal measure. However, none of this astute cognizance seems to result in avoiding any of the mind-numbing tropes that present themselves as the film thunders along, with all the shallow facets of a sub-par Scream sequel.
The horrors of the island are only vaguely communicated which stops The Resort from ever becoming anything more than 2-star bargain horror fodder. The cast scrapes their way through a bunch of scenes that look like they were written from an amalgamation of throwaway noughties slashers, and the whole thing just feels patched together as they roam this abandoned building.
It’s not unwatchable and The Resort will appeal to fans of lukewarm horrors that are more about suspense than gratuitous violence (of which there is mercifully little).
The final third of The Resort is a strobe-lit mess that will have audiences begging for a wrecking ball to come and finish off this godawful setting. None of the characters are memorable and their fates are not something you invest in. It is a simple case of wait and see how they each reach a gritty end whilst you ponder how the costume designer (not currently listed on IMDb) got away with placing all of these professional actors in such skimpy outfits.
Given the film was shot on location in Maui, it’s easy to think this was a holiday-tax-write-off kind of deals. I’d report them to the IRS...if I cared.
THE RESORT WILL BE RELEASING ON DIGITAL AND ON DEMAND FROM 30th APRIL 2021
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