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★★★
Directed by: Lee Neville
Written by: Lee Neville
Starring: #LeeNeville, #JaneHogan, and #DanielleLittle
I have spent so much time recently staring at Mr Lee Neville’s face and pondering about his romantic affairs that I feel like I am married to him. Which would be insane because coupling his dysfunctional approach to relationships with my borderline insanity and non monogamous approach to life, would only result in World War III.
So what’s Neville up to this week? Going to his job? Brushing his hair? Trying to learn how to do hand transplants? Bottling his essence to give to guys who have problems boning chicks? No, of course not, he is sitting in a room arguing with a lady over his messed up commitment issues... duh.
In short film Three Times Moving: The Kiss Through Time, his lady friend seems to be putting up with more of Neville’s crap than the others did (see my previous movie reviews), he is very clear about how he can’t commit to her, being rude to her in one particular scene in the bed, just downright being a total fuck boy...oh Neville how are ya pulling this “lady juggling” off so well when you treat them so mean?
It’s not long before this week’s main lady takes her leave after walking in on Neville cosying up to another woman [of course, I hoped it would have been a man or a goat to spice things up a bit, but no such luck] on the very same bed they had shared, but to be honest he is sharing it with a bunch of other ladies so she shouldn’t really be that alarmed.
Neville pulls his usual lines out of the bag, his trouble with commitment, how he can’t express himself, how he is half man half centipede...well maybe not that one, but to say the least we have heard it all before, and surprise surprise, she swoons, they kiss....fin.
Now let’s not be dismissive, and scream ‘’What? Is this not almost the same as the last one!!!??’’ let’s put on our thinking caps and try to understand the message that Neville is trying to get across with his saga of short films about love affairs...yeah I got nothing either.
I don’t mean to downplay his efforts. They are apparent, and as I said about the last shorts the acting skills are excellent, his directing skills regarding camera angles is done to a good standard, and they are all easy and generally pleasant to the eye when viewing. But by now, after Three Times Moving when I am three films deep in to Mr Neville’s love opera, I sit back and say...I don’t get it.
How much can he beat this dead horse of a storyline until we all go mad? How much more can he bleed from this? I get it, you can’t commit, all the women around you to seem to not be able to commit very well either, can no one commit to anything! People suck! And so I your beloved and god like film critic [I know, I’m down playing your true feelings] have not 1 but 2 more instalments of Neville work to go, and by god if at the end someone does not reveal themselves as a lizard person, or that they are all indeed in a sex cult I’m going to scream.
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