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The Wet Ones

average rating is 1 out of 5


Jason Knight


Posted on:

Aug 30, 2021

Film Reviews
The Wet Ones
Directed by:
Wig Wolf
Written by:
Wig Wolf
Kevin Walter, Beatrice Freire Campbell, Rachel Alig, Michael Novelli

Two and a half hours filled with dolls, heavy insults, violence, blood and grotesque deeds. This lengthy feature could be described as a puppet show for adults and one that is not suitable for a sensitive audience.


This lengthy feature consists of intertwined stories about characters having all sorts of trouble. There is a great deal of arguing going on, tons of profanity, assaults, mutilation and murder. The characters here just do not seem to be able to find a nice way to get along. They swear at each other, hit each other and kill using a variety of weapons, such as knives and chainsaws. Trying to make sense of the dialogue or narrative can be quite a challenge.


The characters consist of a variety of figures. There are humanlike dolls, cut-out figures that have been drawn and coloured and dolls made out of clay and plasticine. The ones that were created for the film are poorly made and look awful. The creators hold the figures, keeping their fingers out of frame and move them around. The result gives the impression that the dolls are being handled by children. Some of the characters have names such as Titanic Sinclair, Kitty Krueger and Joe Motor.


Regarding the background, the characters are often infront of a painted background or in a dollhouse. The painted settings do not look too bad. There is also a fictional TV channel logo that keeps appearing from time to time.


There are sequences that show actors, playing characters such as Crawline and the Disco Master. They pretty much appear out of the blue and when they do, they tend to address the audience. There are also times when people dance and sing in front of a screen with changing colours like a music video. The performances by the cast is not serious or realistic and the same could be said about the voice actors. The voice acting consists of over the top performances and listening to them is more annoying, rather than humorous. The fact that the voices are irritating to the ear could be deliberate and the goal might be to be funny, however the viewer might find the experience too silly to be amusing, as the voice actors seem to be trying to hard to be ridiculous.


The look of the film is unusual. Filming took place utilizing VHS tape, Mini DV tape and Video 8 tape, and the result gives the impression that the movie was made decades ago.


The soundtrack includes disco music among others and the sound effects do not sound good. The lighting is poor and lacks creativity. The editing makes frequent use of superimposition and dissolve techniques. The camera work is very clumsy and there is a lot of shaking going on. There are many closeups of the dolls' faces throughout and accompanied by the childish voices, they are awkward to watch.


This feature is the same thing from start to finish: swearing, blood and violence. A great deal of fake blood is added when the dolls injure each other and they get covered in red as a result. They do disgusting things to each other and some of the dolls are naked and it is graphic. This is a movie that relies on brutality, twisted humour, adult humour and toilet humour in order to try to attract attention. It is poorly made, with weak performances and hardly any story. The characters are unlikeable and listening to them swear or watching them mutilate each other is an uncomfortable experience. This film is probably not worth two and a half hours of anyone's time.

About the Film Critic
Jason Knight
Jason Knight
Indie Feature Film
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